Tonight and Always
by Big Albowski
Summary: Futurefic: Clark's guardian spirit watches over her charge.


Disclaimer: Smallville is not mine and I am making no money off of this.  
  
Tonight and Always  
  
2031  
  
He sits alone in his apartment as he usually does after one of his patrols. Unknown to him, I sit here with him.as I usually do. The guardian of the guardian. His superhuman abilities keep him from bodily harm; I try to protect his spirit. He looks sad tonight, beaten down by the years of responsibility he has undertaken for a world that has been less than kind to him. No, that is not quite true. Superman is loved by millions. He is an idol to children around the world and he has received honors from every nation on Earth. However, it is not Superman that concerns me, it is Clark.  
  
Clark Kent, son of Jonathan and Martha, former resident of Smallville, Kansas, current resident of Metropolis, is the reason I am here. It is times like this that I wish I could really touch him.  
  
Metropolis is quiet tonight. No emergencies to distract him or disasters that needed to be averted. The reporter gets a vacation occasionally but it is rare that the superhero is idle. I am glad for it tonight.  
  
My purpose has always been to sooth his soul. This is not easy when he can neither see nor hear me.. at least not conventionally. This has been my role since the day I died. It was only then that my true destiny was revealed.  
  
2005  
  
I can feel my life draining from me. I try to focus my eyes through the tears. He is coming. I feel it. I won't die alone. I can't.  
  
I see him appear as if out of nowhere. He screams my name. The pain on his face is clear. With all my strength I reach for him and speak his name.  
  
"Clark."  
  
He rushes to my side and holds me in his arms. I see panic on his face. He knows I am going to die.  
  
"You have to fight. I can't lose you. Not now!"  
  
I am fighting, but I am losing. I look up into his face. I have to tell him one last time.  
  
"I love you. I always have. I always will."  
  
I feel myself slipping into darkness. I am not afraid. Spending my last moments with him means everything to me. During my last breath, I hear him say what I needed to hear.  
  
"I love you."  
  
They were not words spoken in comfort, but a declaration of his soul. Those words defined my soul.  
  
2031  
  
As I now sit beside him, I am flooded with the memories of his remarkable life. He has been through so much. For all the challenges and pain Superman has endured, Clark has suffered the most.  
  
My death was so hard on him. Harder than I could conceive. He had fought meteor freaks, criminals and a number of other crazies in his young life. Losing me was his first crushing blow. I tried to help him, ease his pain. I whispered to him words of comfort and of love. I directed his dreams to show him visions of hope and happiness. With time, he began to plan his future.  
  
He went to college and studied journalism. He worked at some small papers here and there all the while being the secret savior when he was needed. His secret kept him from developing any real friendships along the way. His self-imposed loneliness was difficult. Then he moved to Metropolis. It was then his life would change.  
  
In Metropolis, he could not be just an anonymous helpful stranger. The city. the world. needed more. He needed to be Superman.  
  
It was that name that Lois had given him after his first appearance. Little did she know that her biggest story occupied the cubicle across from her. Little did she know that she would fall in love with both of them before discovering the secret.  
  
Clark had suffered greatly because of his deception. How hard it must have to keep his secret from his childhood friends and from those he loved. By keeping his secret from Lois, he felt like he was again betraying a friend. and to Clark, his friends were everything because they had become a rarity. Lois however was different. He was falling in love with her and distancing himself from her hurt desperately. Every night he needed me. My comfort, my love.  
  
When his secret was revealed to her, his pain soon turned to joy. His joy was mine as well. For a few short years, he needed me little. I watched over him when he married Lois. His fame as a reporter grew as did his fame as Superman. Only a few shared that secret. For him, at that time, it was enough.  
  
Then his world caved in upon itself.  
  
2024  
  
He stands atop the tallest structure in the city. Nobody will see him here. Nobody will see Superman cry. Except me. I will be the only one to know. I will be the only one to witness what today has done to him.  
  
His childhood friend Lex Luthor has murdered his wife. Lois is dead because the President of the United States did not want his dark secrets revealed. Clark had warned her not to go alone to investigate. She lied when she said she would not go.  
  
He gave a great cry and flew into the heavens. I had never seen him fly so fast. He encircled the planet many times before he stopped. before he returned home. After Lois' funeral, he would see none of his friends from work. For weeks after the event the world could talk of nothing but how the president was accused of murder. For weeks, I did what I could to ease his grief.  
  
Just as Clark's pain appeared to ease, he received word that his parents were killed in an accident on their way to Metropolis to see him. He, of course, blamed himself.  
  
He had not been the same since.  
  
2031  
  
Over the last several years, I have done my best to help him. He allows himself to get close to some friends. Jimmy has been his closest friend over the last few years. He keeps in touch with Perry since he retired. Even former president Pete Ross and Lana have kept in touch despite their political responsibilities. To this day, only Pete and Jimmy know that Clark is Superman. Not even Lex divulged that fact before his execution. Probably one last attempt at dignity. Clark stills prefers to spend most of his time alone when Superman is not needed.  
  
As I look over him now, I see the tension ease from his face. He leans his head back and closes his eyes. He still looks like that handsome teenager I fell in love with during my life. I also see the tragic hero I still love. the one who has sacrificed so much of his life for others, asking for nothing in return.  
  
I lean close to him and whisper my words of hope and love to him. My essence surrounds him as it has done since the beginning of this existence. I hope he will allow himself to love again. He is ready to open himself to the possibility. When he loves, he loves completely. I know. I was lucky enough to have experienced that love in life. if only for a short time before I was lost to him.  
  
He begins to fall asleep. What dreams await him? I will try to make sure they are happy ones tonight. Tonight and always.  
  
FIN 


End file.
